Talking about money is never easy, no matter who that person is and how much you trust them. Conversations about finances usually end in arguments and as we all know money is one of the main reasons couples split. But it doesn’t always need to be that way. The best way to avoid any misunderstandings is by talking about finances with your partner before commingling your money.
It is important to have an open honest conversation about this and know them financially before you make any decisions. So here are 4 things you can talk about so that both of you are on the same page whether you are just starting to get more serious or you decided to move in together.
⇣ Save this to your life as a couple Pinterest board for later ⇣
4 THINGS TO GET YOU TALKING ABOUT FINANCES WITH YOUR PARTNER
Now that things are getting serious between the two of you (congrats!), it is crucial to set some strong bases to ensure things will be stable and you can build a future together. If you get it right, it can be a way of doubling your income without doubling your expenses. You can also reach your financial goals faster if you work together because finances in a relationship should be a team effort.
Having said that, it doesn’t mean you can change the plan over time. Be flexible to change as long as you both talk about it while keeping your goals and needs in mind.
KNOW EACH OTHER’S FINANCIAL VALUES
You can also think of this as your financial personality. See where each of you stands and why.
Ask each other: are you a spender or a saver? What is your relationship with money?
For instance, if one of you has never had money problems, that person can be a saver because they know the value of money and like feeling stable. On the other hand, the other person might be a spender because they are used to living paycheck to paycheck. So when they get a larger amount of money they spend it immediately.
Knowing this can help both of you understand each other better and set a common ground. It can also help you map out how to split your finances and work towards your financial goals.
SET FINANCIAL GOALS
These goals can be both personal and conjunctive. How you set them depends entirely on the type of goals you have.
Ask each other: when do you want to retire? Do you want to have/own a home? Do you want to have children? Do you want to go back to school? How often do you want to go on a vacation?
Depending on where you stand, the way you spit your finances to work towards your goals might vary over time. For example, in the beginning, you could have separate accounts for personal goals and monthly spending, while also sharing a common account for paying bills and saving for common goals. Later on, you might have only one account for savings, one for spending, and another one for your kids. It all depends on how your goals and finances evolve.
FINANCIAL PAIN POINTS
This is where things get a little sensitive because being honest about money is not always easy.
Ask each other: what is your relationship with money? Do you have any financial baggage (AKA do they have debt)? Do you have “trauma with money”? Are you bankrupt or have you ever filed for bankruptcy?
For example, if one of you grew up poor, that person might appreciate everything more because they grew up without those privileges. While the other didn’t and might feel less attached to material things.
Think about all the things that might trigger an argument or a misunderstanding when it comes to finances. This might help both of you decide how to manage your finances as a couple. Knowing these things can give you an idea of what could be a problem or an opportunity for setting your goals and splitting bills, mortgages, or any other financial responsibilities.
PLAN FOR THE WORST
No one likes thinking much less talking about the worst-case scenario, but when it comes to finances you have to.
Ask each other: what would happen if one of us loses their job? Who would take of our financial needs if one of us gets sick? What happens then?
Come up with a backup plan for the “what ifs”. You never know what could happen and having a safety net can help. It will also give both of you a sense of stability knowing that you will be ok if something were to happen. This could be a savings account or even a safe with money. It is up to you.
TO SUM IT UP
Talking about finances with your partner is never easy, but it is a necessary step before commingling your finances to avoid misunderstandings. Especially if it is your first time moving in together or getting more serious in your relationship.
Remember finances in a couple are a team effort and all decisions in this regard affect both of you.
Thank you for taking some time of your day to read our blog, we truly appreciate it. We hope these 4 things to get you talking about finances with your partner help you take the first steps. Feel free to reach out if you have any questions and don’t forget to subscribe to our newsletter and follow us on Instagram for more ideas and tips.
Hablar de finanzas con tu pareja - Two passports one love
noviembre 15, 2020 at 2:02 pm[…] Read in English […]